You mentioned in your own sharp-tongued way that the best thing about this blog so far is Jen's comment to my first post (Jen's comment = "clapping!" God love her).
After reading that I cried in the bathroom for about two, two and half hours, while muttering "you IDIOT (my name)"! Stupid! I TOLD you this was a bad idea! Idiot!" over and over under my alcohol-soaked breath. Finally, summoning the courage of J-Lo in "Enough", I rose, walked to my front porch and wailed "Damn you, Anonymous!" into the night. I think I used just the right amount of fist wavery. It felt real.
So listen, Anonymous (or as I like to call you, stupid-head) - I'm new to this extremely narcissistic and cut-throat game you savvy interwebians call "blogging." In an attempt to appease you and get my creative juices flowing, I did what any good writer does when faced with "the block" (that's wordsmith speak - no big deal). I spent the last hour sitting in complete darkness listening to a CD I have of the sound of a tap dripping which a friend recorded for me in case of such an emergency. After that I drew several elves and other woodland creatures on a piece of paper and then balled up the paper and swallowed it whole while punching myself repeatedly in the throat. Finally, I read "Are you There God, it's Me, Margaret" backwards while chain-smoking gauloises.
I'm sorry, Big A. I let you down. You, my only reader! I promise to devote all waking hours here on in to coming up with ways to cyber-ly entertain you. I have a pretty good picture of my boobs to post in case I don't come up with anything soon.
At least you like the background colour.